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Cossack Owners Club |
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Radio Horizontal Those
of a nervous disposition may wish to skip this news bulletin. Many of
you will have noticed that in the March issue of Horizontal News there
were a number of regrettable editorial oversights. The date of the
Autumn rally in Dent was simply omitted. A line was missing from the
front page. And the fine Welsh
town of Conwy was misspelt. The Horizontal Editorial Board decided that enough was enough. The then editor, Mr Peter Barker, was summoned to a People’s Tribunal or, as they are known in Horizontal Towers, a Show Trial. After a mere few hours in the most benign detention Mr Barker recanted. He
admitted to charges of revisionism, antirevolutionary activity and
spreading bourgeois propaganda. He begged the Tribunal to show him no
mercy. He was found guilty of all charges. The Presidental Prerogative
of Mercy was not exercised in his case. As a result he was taken from
the court to be consigned to People’s Re-education Camp #7 (Oswaldtwistle)
without visiting rights for an indefinite period.
Horizontal News will for the time being be edited by our new placeman,
Pyotr who has express instructions to return to this organ the standards
of decency, uprightness, and dignity for which it was once famed
throughout the motorcycling world. Pyotr has our very greatest
confidence. Since some of you may not know him we have printed his
photograph (right) so that you will be able to identify him as he goes
about his new duties. |
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And A Very Big Hello To George Annati, Malta. Mark
McArthur-Christie, Bampton, Oxon.
Brendan Coles, Hasfield, Glos.
Jonathan Shaw, Huddersfield, W. Yorks.
Charles Flanagan, Sutton, Surrey. John
Tucker, Rye, East Sussex. Chris
Davies, Haverfordwest, Pembs. David
Ludlow, Betchworth, Surrey. Jeff
& Sandra Ward, Newark, Notts. (Are
we sure there’s enough room for all these people?) |
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Comrade Carl’s Calamitous Catastrophe Oh,
Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl, Carl. What do you do with him, eh? First he
invites you to buy Uttoxeter tickets early for £12 by sending him a
cheque. Then he doesn’t give you his address. Then he goes to the Winter
Olympics. (Yes!) Then he comes back and admits the price is wrong too.
Oy oy oy. So if you are paying in advance for the Uttoxeter rally it is
FIFTEEN pounds. And
you send your cheque to Comrade Carl at: 6, Curzon Road, St Annes on Sea
FY8 3SE. Carl? Naughty!! |
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When in Norfolk……
There
you are riding through North Norfolk. It’s getting late. It’s getting
cold. It’s getting ridiculous. You
haven’t got your heated underwear. You don’t want to have to put that
tent up. Then lo! What light through yonder window breaks? It is Jan and
Dave Morrison’s B&B at Hindolveston. And boy, does it look good. They
are CoC members and their combo even has pride of place on their
website: www.45thestreet.co.uk. Check
it out (and say hello to Monty). |
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Letters Dear
Ed. Am I
the only one who doesn’t like the monicker 'Cossack Owners Club'?
Cossack isn`t a brand name and nobody actually owns a Cossack perse.
What’s more, many people, on hearing the name “Cossack” instantly think
back to that saddo 1970s male hairspray. It really does sound a bit lame
and embarrassing. The
term Owners Club also encourages the rivet counter brigade and doesn`t
really do justice to the many owners who are keen and active riders.
Look at the difference between HOG (Harley Owners Group) and HDRCGB
(Harley Davidson Riders Club Great Britain). Also look at the likes of
the MZ Riders Club. The choice of name may be difficult as some suitable
ones exist elsewhere - like Russian Iron and Soviet Steeds for instance
– but I`m sure some possibilities can`t be too hard to muster. I do
realise that the term Russian technically excludes Dneprs and Minsks but
there must be a few possibilities. Food
for thought anyway.
Cheers Steve
‘Tarka’ Thomas
Historically, we have been:
Ural Owners Club;
Ural (Cossack) Owners Club; and Cossack Owners Club. We resisted the
pressure from Nevals to change to Neval Owners Club and also some
suggestions involving Soviet (not Soviet any more), Russian (many bikes
not Russian), and Red Riders (too left for many). So we stuck with
Cossack. But the future does, I guess, look Ural now. (Peter—
Oswaldtwistle) Hi
Peter, You
did hear me right regarding the Krystall rally although I went on a C90
not C70 - but I won't hold that against you as there was beer involved,
on my part if not yours. What a great time I had at the Dragon too, its
always a great rally despite the temperature. The cold brings out the
crackpots. There's just something about winter rallies - its another
dimension. It also makes the summer rallies seem hotter……
Cheers, Andy Hello
Peter, I've
just opened my copy of the COC newsletter. I see you've listed the
Popham Weekend, thanks for that on behalf of Team Grim. Unfortunately
the way it's been listed it gives the impression that it's a COC rally,
which it isn't, although members of the COC are welcome to attend. The
Popham Sidecar Camping Weekend, which is solely organised by Team Grim,
is an all makes rally and that's the way we'd like to keep it - open to
all. But we do recognise that we do attract a large number of Ural/Dnepr
owners; and in recent years with the COC holding their AGM at Popham,
(at Team Grim's invitation), folk have wrongly assumed who it was that
was organising the rally. Perhaps in the next issue of the Horizontal
News you could lay the page out so that Popham is with the other events. All
the best Steve
Lyons Team
Grim
Sorry, Steve. We’ve just doubled his sentence in the re-education camp.
Pyotr. |
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TECH.
TALK
Well, they clearly haven’t spent winter out there in Siberia blowing into their gloves and stamping their feet because here are all the technical improvements you’ll find on 2010 model Urals. Impressive or what? Engine
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